Why My House Is a Mess and My Heart Is Full
I used to think I had to choose between a clean house and a connected home. That if I couldn’t keep up with laundry, dishes, and dust bunnies, I was somehow failing. That belief? I’ve let it go. (Okay — I’m trying to let it go.)
Because here's the truth: I live with a teenager who has ADHD and anxiety. And while some people have tidy houses with well-labeled storage bins, I have a kitchen table covered in unfinished puzzles, fidget toys, and a few abandoned cups. I have half-folded laundry on the couch, shoes in the hallway, and a living room that doubles as a crash pad when emotions get too big.
It’s not Instagram-perfect. But it’s real. And it’s ours.
The Mess Isn’t Just Physical
Some days, the mess is in our moods. It’s in the meltdowns that seem to come out of nowhere, or the battles over food, screens, and schoolwork. It’s the emotional overload that turns simple plans into full-on panic. And sometimes? It’s the mess inside me. The guilt. The frustration. The deep breath I take before reminding myself, “We’re doing the best we can.”
And we are.
Our Wins Look Different — But They Matter
We might not have chore charts that work for more than a week. But we’ve got inside jokes and moments where my son lets his guard down. We have late-night talks when anxiety won’t let him sleep. We have hugs that last longer than they used to and trust that’s been built brick by brick, even on the hardest days.
There’s a quiet kind of joy in that. A messy kind. The kind that doesn’t need to be posted — it just needs to be felt.
Letting Go of Perfect
I’ve learned that a full heart doesn’t come from spotless floors. It comes from showing up. Again and again. With love, even when you’re exhausted. With grace, even when the day went sideways.
So yes — my house is a mess. And most days, I feel like I’m living in the middle of a beautiful, complicated, chaotic love story.
And you know what? I wouldn’t trade it.
Not for matching throw pillows. Not for Pinterest-worthy pantries. Not even for a clean kitchen floor.
If you're raising a neurodivergent kid, juggling single parenting, or just trying to survive the day-to-day chaos — I see you. You’re not alone. Leave a comment and tell me what your “messy but full” looks like.